One trait of people with great communication skills is a pervasive confidence that is based on solid techniques not just on a feel good attitude.Consider the fear of rejection as a prime example of how the right outlook can take the sting out of rejection and very often even make feeling rejected impossible. For most people rejection is very unpleasant and even the prospect of getting rejected stops them from going for their dreams. Yes, the fear of rejection causes people to avoid situations where there is any possibility of hearing "No!". This is a shame because if you want to have a great job, to make wonderful new friends and to
make your dreams come true you cannot avoid hearing that two letter word. Thankfully, you can take the sting out of rejection and even get to the point where you can smile at rejection. How to Smile at Rejection:1. Treat all responses as feedback
If you are meeting new people and you want to
make friends this is fertile ground for rejection fears to pop up. For this reason it is very important to not take any responses personally.Simply view all responses as feedback to help you learn and adjust your approach. If flexibility
and persistence does not give you good results simply do your best and move onto the next person. Never aim for 100%, do your best and keep going for it. Take the pressure off. Forget about being perfect and view meeting people as a treasure hunt that can uncover fascinating people and from time to time some relics that do not interest you. It will always be a mix of both. 2. Ask yourself - does he qualify?
This is a key distinction when dealing with people. In your mind, hold the question: does he qualify? i.e. to be your friend, to spend more time with you.Do this in a friendly way of course. If you do this with pride or arrogance you will create a very unfavorable first impression and push people
away. This qualification outlook turns the tables. Instead of wishing, wondering and waiting to see if the other person likes you and is responsive you shift your focus so you are the one making those evaluations. Then, if you introduce yourself to someone and he is rude, unfriendly or simply difficult to deal
with it means he does not qualify to get to know you better. And when you think about it, the sooner someone disqualifies himself the better. It allows you to end the conversation and move onto to someone else. I firmly believe that putting worries about rejection in the past is a critical issue for many people although few recognize that. Instead they simply avoid people and situations that could involve rejection. Continue to do that at you cost - your dreams, new experiences and wonderful friendships that will never happen.
-by Peter Murphy.
Labels: how to overcome rejection, Rejection |
